This morning I browsed through the blogging projects piled up in my workfolder (that’s part of it on the right). I found way too many unfinished projects, so I began deleting some of them. I also took the time to manage my photo sets. I have tons of photos, some I use in my blog posts, some are moved to photo album folders, others are uploaded my Flickr Photostream. But I shoot too many photos I don’t need, so I deleted hundreds. There’s also many non-blogging projects. I have too many projects and just need leave most of them behind.
I’ve also been sorting through the baggage of my second life, my past. I’m embarrassed to say this but I’ve been partnered four times in my five years. And I’ve dated way too many guys. If SL was high school, which it is if you really look at how most of us behave, I’d have a bad reputation. And I want to forget all that too, leave it behind. I mean, geez what a mess.
Then there are the recent problems in both my human’s life and my second life. They’ve taken a toll. One real world problem is still in motion but at least we can now see a path forward. And inworld problems have reached the point where I can move forward too. This is all for the good, but events have been intense for too long, and it’s taking time for my mind to sort out all the clutter. I simply must leave all of that behind.
Despite my problems, I think most people looking at my life would see how lucky I’ve been. I have wonderful friends & acquaintances, an amazing home, gorgeous clothes, great places to go and so many activities and events I enjoy. The thing is, I don’t like the remnants of my second life. I need to leave the past behind. I need to leave my mental baggage behind. I need to be the kind and caring person I’ve tried to be in the past. I need to feel renewed.
So, what I’m about to say may not make sense, but I’m not going to move forward with my second life, I’m going to be Starting Over.
I don’t know exactly what this means, but I believe it will reveal itself to me. I don’t know how it will effect my friends but I feel that too will reveal itself in the coming days and weeks and months.